With Christmas and New Years....

With these holidays approaching very close, its a lot going on. The transit strike is big and I'm bias b/c I have relatives that work for transit and I agree with how they feel and what they are fighting for. The media is a blessing and a curse wrapped up together. I truly feel that they should stay non-bias and just report the news. I don't know if its just part of human nature or something bigger that prevents ppl from staying objective. Anyway, I hope things work out for transit workers and that they don't have to pay hefty fines.

With these holidays approaching very close, I'm glad that I have good friends still. See with the good friends I can accept who they are more. Like this guy friend of mine, he likes to talk about himself a lot. He would ask about how I'm doing, but I'm so use to talking about him that I'm usually vague on updates with myself. That's the thing though, he is still a great friend. I'll be having a bad week and he's like come upstate for the weekend and lets chill and it just relaxing and wonderful. Whatever's is in his house I can have and he puts me on to new food which I love learning about. Were he is lacking he definitely makes up for and he's been my friends for a leassst 5 yrs now. Love it!
I just have great balance right now and I guess I'm left in a great state of utopia-ism, so everything is great and I look at the brighter side. This feeling is provided by the wonderful effect of this fast I've been on. Honestly, I've been telling ppl I'm on the fast to cleanse my system & colon in particular, but its the wtg lost affect that grabbed more of my attention. For me though, the outcome to the wtg loss has not been as beneficial. I've lost 5lbs in 6 days. The information that I read said I should lose 2lbs a day, but if your not over-weight its harder to lose as much. So that was a bit disappointing, but I do have a HUGE burst of energy. I require must less sleep and I feel real good. I think clearer and at great ease. This was suppose to be my gift to myself. A cleaner and healthier body.

With Christmas and New Years approaching very close, I've had my 1st "Hollywood Crush" if you will. I have a new found respect for Jamie Foxx. I was watching Ophra and I just loved what insight I was able to see about him, if that's understandable. He is the 1st Male Sag that I have felt this way about. Now let me make it clear that I don't get star stuck at all. They are people just like me, they just have more $, but that's it. So don't expect special Tx from me at all. Anyway, he just really impressed me, its hard to express, but its was the 1st time I was watching a celebrity and wanted to be around them, if the persona he gave off was his true self. I've only felt that way about one other person, who I've mentioned before the married guy. In both case I just had a strong feeling that I would really enjoy hanging out with them. It's weird, but he gives me hope for Sagittarian males. I was told that you can find a deep connections with a Sag male if your a Sag woman. I was of course skeptical and had my disbelief in this theory. I even met some Sag guys and was not impressed, I thought they were rude and opinionated to the point of obnoxiousness. ILL!!! That is not attractive to me at all. Then with Jamie Foxx video and song I was not impressed and I didn't like the image he was portraying before I saw the show. Then toward the end of the show he sang this song and I teared and that was the person I remember when he sang. IT was jus a great thing!....WONDERFUL

Keeping up tempo.

I'm pumped to blog today. I talked about unexpected ppl popping up. Before it was a late call this time its an unexpected email. To recap, it was late Sunday nite, I was sitting at the computer "doing what" I can't recall right now. However...the way things are set up on the computer front is as followed. I usually have multiple windows open at once. A couple of email browsers, anything that I'm researching, and if I'm in the mood my IM lists. This nite IM list was out, so that obviously leaves the other two types of windows open. Anyway, I believe I was about to completely shut-down my computer when I decide to view my emails one last time. If familiar with Hotmail when you sign-in a list of your new mail and junk mail appears on the 1st page displayed. So when I saw the awkward name in my inbox I automatically clicked on it w/o thinking if it was from an acct that send automatic replys when a person mail is opened. Hey!, the intuitive skills were lacking at the top of the late hour.

So it was a birthday wish from someone that I use to be good friends with. It was one of those relationships that matured from childhood, but fizzled. Even though that occurred I made 1 attempt to reconcile in 03' and a birthday email out of consideration in 04'. I didn't do it to receive anything back but when my birthday rolled around in 04' no birthday wish for me and to think about it not even a thank you for the wish I sent. Rude.
So I open the email and it states:

OPENING REMARK

"long time, long time

just a quick note to wish you a happy birthday

i dont know what you're up to, as of late

but i hope & pray that life is treating you well

and that you feel you're on your intended path

have a blessed birthday"

CLOSING REMARK

I have not re read the email since Sunday, and I just copied and paste into blog. I don't want to. From when I read it on Sunday the thing that stood out to me was the 1st line. "Long time, Long time" >>> WHAT? Did we just lose touch or something. To me recollection we were not talking over whatever stupid shit off-set the true problem that we don't fit anymore. You are fucking needy and I played along for so so long trying to fix and comfort all of your insecurities. I promised myself I would not allow any more needy ppl into my life. Now they are like a plague to me.

With that said..lol I have not sent my Thank you reply back yet and if the email acct. is how I previously mentioned then its know that I opened the email. I Truly I want to say more than Thank you, but nothing else would be nice to send. OKAY! just read it again, I'm just able to twist the words around ....."on your intended path" >>> I guess your intended path didn't include me. Nice to know.

(ZOMK-NEESHEM)

I think Thank you is to generous, I should say thansk misspelled or ty -short. As much as I want to be a jerk I think I'm going to hold back how I feel and say just thank you with open and closing remarks. See this is an example of the type of person I want to minimize with certain ppl. I think I'm two fucking nice sometimes. When you get shit you should throw it back and I don't enough. I'm going to practice on my aim. This must go up there with when my ex-boyfriend sent me a birthday wish in early November. Its nice to know that the 2 ppl that I cared for the most outside of family now fit in a new categories of being both _________. There is not even a word for it.

Icing on the cake~

I have a multitude of different feeling as I have become one year older then the previous. Do I still see things through me tlo glasses. Yes!....Can I change.....Yes!.....Do I want to.....No!

1st and foremost the bday went much better then expected.

I expected nothing and got a whole lot of something.

Since food is always a topic here, I share a picture of my cake.

Its a called a Velvet Cake. It was wonderful.

On other news I brought the new or maybe I should say re=released Anthony Hamilton Album. I must admit at 1st I was not feeling it. I guess I was expecting it to be similar to the other one, but it grew on me with its repetitive play. So that's a good things. For someone that doesn't purchase cds often anymore that is a big thing for me. That deserves a "Kudos".

Again on other news, a friend of mine jus came back from Iraq and she is going through mad stuff right now. She experiencing family problems, she just moved into her own place since being back, and being unemployed for the holidays can be hard. She seems to beholding a lot in. I guess when at war things are for the most point done in a organized and structured way. Now to come back to disorder and instability can fuck you up easily. She told me that she was in tears b/c she was late for an interview even though the interviewer said it was okay due to the bad weather. Now Jay is not a cry-cry type of woman so I found her response to be out of the ordinary. Time will tell but Jay is starting to remind me of that crazy girl from the Real World a lil. On the show she use to bug out a lot and she even admitted that it may have been because of Post traumatic Stress. Well let me give my friend more credit then that, that Real World girl may have been a lil touched before the war.

I said:...I FEEL GOOD

Well, today is the day the Lord granted me life on earth. Well not technically, but the day I took my 1st breath on my own. Unsupported and without any help. I'm taking that deep breath right now and it feels good. A new year begins for me with reflection of the past one. A good feeling is apon me right now, a feeling that everything is right with the world and everyone on it.....that is my wish!

Below is my free Astrology reading that is suppose to be personalized toward me. I don't find everything to be true, but most of it is relatable.

Section 1: How You Approach Life and How You Appear To Others You meet life head on and throw yourself into new experiences with zest and enthusiasm. You are direct, straightforward, assertive, and usually completely aboveboard in all your dealings. Candid and incapable of guile, insincerity or phoniness, you project a confident and sometimes arrogant appearance to others. You often lack tact and sensitivity, and can be completely oblivious to others' needs, and inadvertently selfish. You are self-reliant and don't depend upon social approval and reinforcement as much as other people do. You like to be original and do not mind going it alone. You may feel that you do not fit into groups very well, and that you do not naturally blend in and cooperate with others very easily. You like to be either a leader or a loner.
Section 2: The Inner You: Your Real Motivation You are a gambler and an adventurer at heart, one who loves to take risks, to discover and explore new worlds, and to take the untried path rather than the safe, reliable one. You are an independent soul, freedom-loving, and often very restless. You need a lifestyle that provides opportunities for travel, movement, change, and meeting new people. A steady routine which offers much in the way of security but little in the way of space and freedom is odious to you.